‘Change is the only constant’: Illness is one way that our bodies are attempting to adapt to change.  When people tell me that they cannot remember the last time they were sick I am actually just as concerned as when someone tells me that they have been getting sick every month or weekly, or cannot kick an infection.  Occasional sickness is a normal part of health, and does not indicate a deficiency in your immune system or a moral failing in your self-care.  In fact, occasional sickness shows that your immune system has the intelligence to know what to do, the resources to fight, the strength to completely push out unwanted intruders, and that your body has a clear and open exit for the pathology to leave by.  A teacher, Andrew Nugent-Head, once said “Chinese Medicine is all about finding an exit strategy for pathogens”, whether that’s mounting a fever to push the pathogens out by sweat, or by defecation, nasal discharge, productive cough, vomiting, urination, or even crying for emotional pathology.  Just as forest fires are a normal part of a healthy forest and essential to recycling nutrients back into the soil, as well as necessary for the germination of certain kinds of seedlings, occasional sickness, and the ensuing messiness, inconvenience and discomfort of being sick, is part of a healthy immune response and healthy ecosystem. Illness is a part of health.

When is the last time you allowed yourself to be sick?  

We live in a time when it’s almost never convenient to be sick, because we move so fast and have booked ourselves so tightly that we cannot spare time to rest.  Instead of resting, many people will push through with the use of over the counter cold medications (Sudafed, Tylenol, NightQuil, etc…), which by suppressing the symptoms of a cold essentially tells your immune system that its response to pathology is errant.  A large part of the purpose of cold medications is to dry out all of that good productive mucous that ‘s actually the mediumship for flushing pathogens out! Oftentimes an acute illness is the body finally having the resources and strength to fully clear a lingering pathogen.  Trying to suppress the symptoms of a cold can be analogous to the now outdated policy and practice of wildfire suppression.  The consequence of nearly a century of western land management policies directed at suppressing any and all forest fires has contributed to the conditions for the high-intensity, highly destructive forest fires we experience today.  Similar to decades of not getting your attention through acute illnesses, our bodies will eventually get our attention with chronic disease.  Your body will eventually get you to slow down and receive the rest it’s asking for, whether you agree to it or not, so we might as well agree to it. The complications of acute illnesses not being fully cleared by the body fill an entire volume of herbal formulas and their accompanying strategies in Chinese Medical thought, the classic called “Discussions on Damage by Cold”, written in 220 B.C.E. by Zhang Zhong Jing.  Essentially, the longer an acute illness lingers in the body the more it morphs into more complicated, chronic and stubborn pathologies, like Rheumatoid arthritis, autoimmune conditions, menstrual cycle-related issues, and even cancer. 

Acute infections are your body asking for the space to rest and recover and for the resources - fluids - to push out what doesn’t belong.  Simply, when you get sick you are tired, dehydrated, doing too much and need more rest and support.  Support yourself.  The messiness that comes with being sick, whether that’s diarrhea, vomiting, runny nose, headache, fever, or congestion is a product of your body’s good housekeeping; being bed-ridden is the amount of rest your body needs to catch up on.  Celebrate that your body continues to have the intelligence, resources, and strength to expel what doesn’t belong!  Take to heart teacher/practitioner Tim Sullivan’s reminder: “vomiting is the highest form of healing!!”

Viruses and bacteria are constantly evolving: every year there’s a new strain of flu that we have to protect against. Acute infections like colds and flus are agents for change and evolution in us - they provide opportunities to tune up our health naturally and attune us to macro changes happening in our wider environment. Encountering viruses and bacteria is like receiving the most current software update! When we get sick, we just need more time to integrate the update. By allowing the cycles of sickness, tiredness, decay, rot, overdue rest and maintenance to come full circle into renewal and health, we are evolving to better adapt to the changing nature of the world we live in.  Renewal cannot happen without a certain death and letting go first.  Don’t rush the process - trust and allow the intelligence of your body’s immune system to learn, digest, and evolve.  This is good body stewardship!

Keystones for activating your immune system: warmth and fluids and rest, and a combination of all three, like soup, especially chicken soup, or Miso soup with chopped scallions at the onset, teas, warm to hot water, and bundle in bed! Herbs that can also help to boost your immune response, like ginger root, citruses (including the peel and juice), Echinacea, Elderberry, Astragalus. If you’re feeling especially cold and stiff during the initial stages of a cold, take a hot Epsom Salt bath, and add 3 drops of Tea Tree Essential oil, 3 drops of Eucalyptus EO, and 2 drops of Lavender EO into the Epsom Salt and mix well into the salt before dumping it into the hot bathwater. Stay warm and bundle yourself warmly in bed!

This post is inspired by a lecture by Ann Cecil-Sterman

I intermittently struggle with stomach discomfort and sleep, and recently it happened to coincide with a time when business in my practice was slow.  My first impulse was to rally and hustle to get more people onto my table, but I also knew deep down that there’s so much grace in having extra time and space, especially when my body is asking for it.  Can I perceive the grace of more time as an opportunity to color in the parts of my life that don't get regular attention?  Can I honor my needs and give myself the gift of rest, and not run myself more down to meet my ego’s needs for validation?  

That same day I spotted a human flopped out on a big sprawling blanket, a pillow under head, resting in the middle of the park next to my office.. And for hours (no, he was clearly not homeless).  Sometimes he would take his phone out and scroll, but mostly he was focused on the world behind his eyelids.  It was the middle of the day in the middle of the week - one of those kinds of times during which it could appear ‘sloppy form’ for most conscientious, “respectable” adults to be found asleep in a park.  That sprawling human had fully given himself to his task on the blanket - not a qualm or consideration seemed to crease his face.  As I looked on, I realized that his complete lack of vertical integrity, out among the sun and trees, was precisely how I yearned to be!  The complete absence of any qualms about his public ‘beingness’ gave me the permission I needed: I laid out my big blanket under dappled sun and joined him in spirit for an hour or so!  And just today, a couple weeks later, I spotted another (well-homed) human partaking in public park-napping on a blanket! Hooray!! What do you need permission to do?

In a world that constantly aspires towards greater degrees of productivity, efficiency, and achievement, I think we all need the occasional pause, throw-in the towel (lay out the blanket), and lose our vertical integrity for a space in time..  Of course, there are times when we need to push, just as those moments must also be balanced by rest.  After all, are the needs of our egos or the needs of our bodies more important?  Which sustains us?  Which is real?

These are moments when I have to interrogate my values with my knee-jerk reaction to satisfy how I think I should be (my ego).  Times like these, when my body asks for more support, are gifts redirecting me towards what’s real.  What do you consider to be real in your life that doesn’t necessarily agree with what we value as a society?  

Tao Te Ching - Lao Tzu - chapter 44

Fame or self (health): Which matters more?

Self (health) or wealth: Which is more precious?

Gain or loss; Which is more painful?

(translation by Gia-fu Feng and Jane English)

The other evening, I was on a walk with cute dog Clifford!  We were about to cross the street in the tree-lined neighborhood, when a loud bark issued from the block catty corner from us.  Clifford refused to budge, looked towards the sound and attuned all his senses to the source of the sound.  And so I too opened and widened all of my senses to that space in time, and waited and breathed… It was dusk and a gentle breeze rustled the tree tops - the regal trees stood sentinel to the neighborhood shushing in the darkness, people quietly passed on sidewalks around us. Amidst the ‘closing’ movements of people and Nature all around me, in this pause of movement within me, and through the opening of all my senses.. I discovered the perfection of that moment!  Our senses are portals to presence.

The challenges of different situations in my life still existed - I still didn't quite know how to be courageous in the areas of my life I desired to grow more. And yet… being on that corner breathing.. pausing.. watching.. listening… to cars, people, dogs, the wind, the trees, my breath, and light and time pass I “re-membered” that perfection is within us and all around us in each moment, when we can become present to it, if we can pause to perceive it.

There is perfection and wholeness in every inhale-exhale, in every click or patter of a heel contacting cement, in every unmet need, in every heartache.. It's easy to feel overwhelmed by feelings of sadness, lack, worry, the feeling of brokenness in our own lives and in the wider world all around us.  I believe it's possible to recover that sense of life’s holy completeness and our place in the world in the spaces in-between life's hustle. 

Where does your mind live?  In the past - wishing certain circumstances had turned out differently?  In the future - incessant movement towards the next and the next and the next, or in the anxiety of constant anticipation or fear of what could happen?  Or in the present?  

Are you your mind?  

Can you bring the light of your awareness to the story spinning in your mind when you are feeling stressed out?

Can dis-ease exist in complete presence?  

Magic happens when we pause 

Pause* 

Or at least.. 

Try giving more attention to the spaces in your consciousness than the words or thoughts.

CH.11 of The Tao Te Ching

Thirty spokes converge upon a single hub;

It is on the hole in the center that the use of the cart hinges.

We make a vessel from a lump of clay;

It is the empty space within the vessel that makes it useful

We make doors and windows for a room;

But it is these empty spaces that make the room livable.

Thus, while the tangible has its advantages, it is the intangible that makes it useful.

Thank You Clifford 💛

As a practitioner of Chinese Medicine, I hear from a lot of people that Acupuncture or even herbal medicine is too expensive, too slow to work, or ambiguous whether it is even working, especially when compared to pharmaceutical solutions where a single pill can relieve an issue quickly, cost-effectively, and definitively, like anxiety.  From a pure dollars perspective this is 100% true, but the price you pay is its effect on your body’s ecosystem.  A healthy ecosystem (whether our bodies or Nature) is invaluable and cannot and should not be quantified, for it is the basis for everything else meaningful in life.  Health is the kind of resource that once lost, sometimes no amount of wealth can buy back, as people who have experienced the life-changing effects of chronic illness can attest to.  This similar sentiment also applies to our natural world and the resources and enrichment it provides.  

Pharmaceuticals are very specific solutions that have been extracted from nature and then chemically-combined and recombined to be very targeted solutions for very specific problems, which they do extremely well, but at the expense of the rest of the system, which we call ‘side effects’.  If one problem needs a quick fix, pharmaceuticals are a good clutch player - they can fill a role in a time of need extremely well.  If you have a cold and coughing is keeping you up, TylenolPM can allow you to rest and therefore recover.  However, over the long term, because they don’t address the imbalance in the system that stemmed the issue in the first place, nor how the side effects from the medication are now affecting the system, while also allowing you to continue the habits that brought you to this situation in the first place by masking symptoms, pharmaceuticals taken long-term are contributing to the slow, but progressive degradation of your ecosystem, or health.  We aren’t born with anxiety, usually something has happened along the way, or commonly we are experiencing a nutritional deficit that leads to anxiety (more on blood deficiency later).

By contrast, herbal medicine and acupuncture use whole systems to treat and interact with whole systems. Acupuncture developed in a time when people did not view the human experience as disparate parts requiring disparate interventions, which we now are accepting as true - every interaction with the body, mind, or Spirit affects not just the body, but it’s inter-dependence with all other parts.  When one area is affected it affects the whole: when you receive acupuncture for headaches for example, other things change along the way too, like sleep, digestion, anxiety, general nervous system regulation, etc. I also consider an herb a whole system, because like food, while we may have identified a single chemical compound active in mitigating anxiety, there’s a constellation of other chemical compounds within that herb or food that helps that single compound to be more easily assimilated or enhanced within the body, or is doing something helpful that we have even yet to identify!  The seemingly inactive chemical compounds help us to more readily reap the herb’s fullest benefits, with less side effects.  Herein lies the increased efficacy of herbal formulas compared to single herbs.  When the complexity of whole systems interact with the complexity of whole systems there is exponentially more opportunity for maximizing the overall potential of both systems, because there are so many more mutually beneficial connections that can be made!  The end result yields an ecosystem that is more abundant, more productive, more self-regulating, solves for other problems, and is more resilient.  Is resiliency not the definition of a healthy system?  While i believe that there is a place and time for pharmaceutical interventions, I will almost always suggest how to use whole foods or herbs as medicine, before suggesting single extract supplements, and then medications.  Whole systems inherently know how to relate to whole systems.  As Andrew Sterman says, “Life loves Life!”.

The resilience of natural systems comes from their complex interconnections.  While we as humans think reductionistically to identify the most active compound driving an herb’s efficacy, or reduce pain to the site of the imbalance, what if something’s efficacy or lack of efficacy exists in how the elements within that system are working together?  I have a friend Sam who was a former college high jumper and now coaches Olympic level track and field athletes.  After observing that physical strength had surprisingly little relation to muscle mass in archery, I asked him what made a person physically strong.  He responded that it actually had to do with how well the body’s muscle and nerve fibers are working in coordination… Interesting!  Acupuncture and herbal medicine may be slower to work than pharmaceuticals, but they solve a problem by rectifying and reinforcing the connections between elements that comprise health - communications between organ systems, the mind-body connection, blood oxygenation and circulation, neuro-endocrine connections, and so on and so forth.  Acupuncture and herbal medicine increase the amount of interactions within your system, and therefore increases its complexity.  Ecosystems that are more complex are more resilient, which means they are better able to tolerate and recover from disturbances than ecosystems that are less complex.  When we prioritize efficiency (which we inevitably must at times in this day and age) the tradeoff is resilience.  As an alternative medical provider, I am naturally biased towards natural interventions, because I believe in our bodies innate wisdom and capacity for healing and renewal, and the tools that tap into that evolutionary wealth of knowledge. I am inviting you to consider the true value of acupuncture and herbal medicine, as an opportunity to engage in more robust and resilient health!

Evidence-based Healthcare:

This study compares the efficacy of Lorazepam vs. the Chinese herbal formulas Suan Zao Ren Tang and Zhi Zi Chi Tang in the treatment of anxiety and insomnia: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4352487/  At 2 weeks time they had equal efficacy on insomnia, but at 4 weeks time, changes in objective and subjective sleep measures indicated that subjects taking SZRT+ZZCT experienced greater benefit compared to those taking Lorazepam.  Regarding anxiety, those taking SZRT+ZZCT experienced a more powerful reduction in anxiety at 2 and 4 weeks time compared to those taking Lorazepam. Disclaimer: The brilliance of Oriental Medicine is that there is no one acupuncture point prescription or herbal prescription that corresponds to an issue, which this study could suggest.  While this study only illustrates one type of imbalance, insomnia and anxiety can come from at least 12 different types of imbalances, and therefore at least 12 different herbal formula and point prescriptions to choose from, which is why you should always seek a Chinese Medicine practitioner to diagnose and prescribe herbs and acupuncture for an issue.  

This article entry was inspired by herbal teacher Ann Wolman, herbalist Asia Dorsey, Fractal Praxis work by Caroline Savery, the Denver Permaculture Design Course, and a talk given by Water Harvester Brad Lancaster.

What do all of the above have in common? They are all forms of Yin, which in Oriental Medicine is restful energy, the ability to receive (whether that’s life, fertility, inspiration, the capacity to reflect, or surrender to sleep), as well as the physical and energetic resources that the body needs for integrating life. The more Yin energy/ resources you have the more you are able to receive and reflect deeply, be flexible and fluid physically and mentally, and the faster you are able to integrate the emotional vicissitudes of life, or by contrast recover from a hard workout – all activity requires Yin/ resources to fuel it, integrate it, and aid in recovery. To those looking to preserve their youthfulness, Yin is the essence of a youthful appearance and the basis for longevity. Another way of talking about Yin from a Biomedical perspective is ‘hydration’. Hydration, hydration, hydration! We all know the importance of sufficient hydration, but especially in the Fall (and Winter), which in Chinese Medicine, is the season when ‘dryness’ is the pathological factor our systems (especially the Lungs), become most susceptible to.

As important as drinking water is for hydration, it’s simply not enough. For many people, assimilating water is a challenge if your digestive fire and therefore your digestion is already challenged – you often experience bloating and gas, loose stools, or don’t have a clear or strong appetite. Water for people who have digestive challenges may just end up as a damp bog in the stomach, instead of assimilated and distributed to places where it’s needed. Enter warm, wet foods: Soups! Stews! And grain porridges (especially for breakfast)! Warm foods, especially when they are well cooked and filled with water are in a form that is easy for the stomach to digest and assimilate fluids at a deeper level, and in the case of grain porridges, they are specifically nourishing to the lining of the stomach. If we consider breakfast foods across cultures, nearly every continent and culture has a version of a breakfast porridge: in parts of West Africa it’s a millet porridge, in East Asia it’s a rice porridge, in the UK it’s oatmeal, in the American South it’s corn grits! Cooked warm wet foods are the medium for much deeper fluid assimilation than just drinking straight water. High quality, cooked with lots of water, non-GMO organic, whole grains are essential to a healthy stomach. If you are still finding grains are hard on your digestion eat yams or sweet potatoes! (Either way, healthy carbohydrates play an important role in the health of our Stomach organ.) Hydration gained through foods - soups, stews, porridges, and even fruits - provide a deeper level of hydration necessary for the body. While traveling in Eastern Europe one summer, I found myself surrounded by delicious heavy foods, plenty of fresh water, and lots of fresh fruits and vegetables, and yet found myself deeply craving soups! While water cleanses and hydrates, soups, stews and porridges hydrate at a deeper level.

Your Stomach Fluids are your ability to adapt to your external environment:

Our systems are constantly being challenged to adapt to the external world, whether it’s our nervous system with (righteous) road rage, or immune system from the 25 degree drop overnight or a raging pandemic or jetlag, or our digestive system from the chili cheese dog with extra chili and extra cheese. In Oriental Medicine, the heart of our body’s ability to physically adapt to the present environment is our Stomach, specifically our Stomach Yin, or Stomach fluids. No wonder it’s also at the center of our bodies…! And no wonder all doctors across time and medical traditions have all prescribed rest, and lots of fluids when sick. The health of your stomach is as an essential aspect to a healthy immune resistance and response. Stomach Fluids enable your innate immune structures, like your mucous membranes and pores, to secure the entryways that pathogens would otherwise exploit to enter the body; Stomach Fluids are also necessary as the first layer of the body’s mediumship for expelling pathogens, through sweating, peeing, pooping, or vomiting, that have entered your system. This is not to say that there aren’t other aspects to a healthy immune system, but before I reach for an immune boosting herb, I will first reach for a hearty soup or tall glass of water (many times a day).

On Saturated Fats…

The list in the title is also a list of things that we need to prevent getting sick by increasing our system’s resilience; this includes saturated fats. The scientific literature and our understanding is turning and discovering that not all saturated fats are equal or bad for our health (check out this article by Harvard Medical School: https://www.health.harvard.edu/staying-healthy/new-thinking-on-saturated-fat). In fact, our bodies need healthy saturated fats as the building blocks for such essential things as the lipid bi-layer of every cell membrane. If your body doesn’t receive high quality saturated fats from your diet, it will not be able to make high quality metabolic structures, which can affect us as feeling hypersensitive to our external environment for instance, since our cell walls are made of a fatty acid bi-layer. Saturated fats hydrate at the cellular level. In Chinese Medicine, high quality saturated fats, like grassfed products, pasture-raised chicken eggs, and coconut oil, resonate with our constitutional layer - the deepest layer of our bodies, and provide the deepest level of Yin and therefore the deepest level of support and stability to our systems. A sense of deep stability is foundational to our resilience, resistance, and restfulness. In fact, the kinds of fats and oils we do put into our systems are actually a very important and often overlooked aspect to our health and well-being. Stay tuned for a future post on good fats and oils! (I know for many this is very controversial information on saturated fats! For more information on the role of healthy saturated fats in our diets, check out the book: “The Big Fat Surprise: Why Butter, Meat, and Cheese Belong in a Healthy Diet” by Nina Teicholz, written in 2014. Interestingly, Nina Teicholz was vegetarian and ate low-fat for 20 years before she began researching an article on Trans Fats and then all fats for Gourmet Magazine.)

Since we are talking about things that are hydrating, it’s just as important to talk about what is dehydrating: sugar, alcohol, coffee, caffeinated teas, chocolate (sorry..), spicy foods, dry dehydrated foods like dried fruit, beef jerky, crackers, all deplete fluids or cause inflammation and heat in the system that require extra amounts of fluids. Folks who should pay special attention to expanding their hydration: anyone with an autoimmune condition or chronic illness, acute illness, insomniacs or if you have had a night of insomnia, anytime you travel, experiencing a big physical change to your system like surgery, are going through emotional transitions, you have dry lips, or experience neurological symptoms, like tremors… in essence if you are experiencing change you need more yin / hydration to move through it smoothly. As we deepen into Fall (but really year-round), this is an important time to fortify our defenses with good hydration, by expanding and deepening our definition of hydration! It’s also worth mentioning that carbonated drinks are not a replacement for regular flat water - i know, how boring!!

While I will always first recommend therapies that you can do for yourself like food, if you continue to experience a perplexing issue make an appointment to receive more insight from a Chinese Medicine perspective into what is off.

A Hearty Bowl of Soup to You!

In 2006, a few students from Ms. Lockwood’s Xavier Highschool class in New York City wrote to Kurt Vonnegut as part of an assignment to invite and persuade their favorite authors to visit their highschool. As the only author to respond, Mr. Vonnegut politely declined their invitation: “I don’t make public appearances anymore because I now resemble nothing so much as an iguana.”

He did make this suggestion to the students: “Practice any art—music, singing, dancing, acting, drawing, painting, sculpting, poetry, fiction, essays, reportage—no matter how well or badly, not to get money and fame, but to experience becoming, to find out what’s inside you, to make your soul grow.” He then gave them the homework assignment to write a 6-line poem, then tear it up and disperse the tiny fragments to different trash receptacles throughout their homes, so that it could never be shown to anyone. The importance of that assignment is the unfolding relationship you make with yourself in the process of writing that poem, not the external validation or praise that comes from having shown it to another person, per Mr. Vonnegut: “You will find that you have already been gloriously rewarded for your poem. You have experienced becoming, learned a lot more about what’s inside you, and you have made your soul grow.”

It’s the end of Summer - the end Fire Element Season, and transitioning into Earth Element Season. While the Fire Element in Chinese Medicine is a time to be active socially and physically, I think it’s also equally important to ask the question: how do we start our own fires that we become more magnetic to ourselves, and therefore to the rest of the world? How do we discover and grow who we are? How do we grow our resilience? Can we value ourselves outside of what we do and what we do for other people?

I have been pondering these questions for awhile; what does deep nourishment and replenishment look like for myself? More importantly, how do I give that to myself? What does regular self-care look like for me? I believe that no matter how much you love your work (and it’s ok if you don’t love your work) work is our interface with the outside world and feeds the ego through external validation that our existence and contribution to the greater world matters; sometimes, but not necessarily, work may also feed the soul – that precious immaterial essence of who we are. When the motivation for what we do is for others to see that action doesn’t feed our souls. There have always been breadcrumb trails of activities that filled me up – collaging, music and song, playing sports (before I cared about being good) movement arts, DIY projects, and yet it’s so hard to make them regular because there is no one that benefits from them, but myself. And alas, I was raised in this modern culture and in Chinese culture that prioritizes importance based on things that are externally visible and externally measurable.

What if who we are inside could be so rich and abundant that we are constantly overflowing in our overabundance, rather than only financing what is externally visible? What if your job was not your life or the primary means of making meaning in your life, but just a part of the rich complexity of who you are? When external validation becomes a lifeline, we are not rooted in who we truly are. If everything we do is for the outside to see, we become hollow and empty inside. In Chinese Medicine, this feeling of inward abundance is Liver blood – when the Liver blood is abundant we feel deeply at ease in our own skin physically and psychologically, we move through the world with ease (our muscles aren’t tight), we are self-assured, our vision is clear metaphorically and eyesight-wise, we can rest deeply, our skin is supple, and we are more resilient to external pathogens - whether to a virus or criticism or judgment from others. What does it feel like to feel filled up and wholly satisfied (by an experience, activity, or life)? When was the last time you felt nourished? What nourishes your life? According to Dr. Randine Lewis in The Spirit of the Blood, “Blood tells us how we feel about our innermost self.”

Consider trying out Mr. Vonnegut’s assignment... Or what can you do for yourself to discover more about who you are or what fills you up? The ability to source soul nourishment is critical to becoming more resilient, more authentic, and learning to trust ourselves. Since moving back to Denver I have yet to come across a martial arts studio that I feel compelled to join - where I usually source my mental and physical wellbeing, as well as that much-needed sense of being capable and good at something. At first I lamented its absence, but it has instead translated into a very personal and very enriching personal movement practice for whom I am its sole beneficiary! I began to realize how much richer my practice has grown since it is just meant to support my growth, evolution, and mento-emotional-physical wellness, and not at all to impress or perform for others.

Some clues for activities include: activities that make you feel timeless or in the flow, be curious about your pace: how slow or fast do you enjoy moving through and taking in the world, and what are activities that put you in touch with your own pace?, engage your senses outside of just vision, stay curious - whether you are good or not doesn’t matter, take yourself less seriously, try something that takes you out of your comfort zone or normal brain patterns, do you have an outlet for self-expression?, take just yourself on an “artist’s date” somewhere that intrigues you, notice what activity allows your diaphragm to totally soften while doing it, be compassionate about the self-discovery process. Or maybe, just removing a witness to an existing activity is the key!

Here is the link to that story about Kurt Vonnegut: https://www.rd.com/article/letter-from-kurt-vonnegut/

In the Spirit of Overflowing Abundance! May we all become more magnetic to ourselves.

Daylight is contracting again, and before today (Daylight Savings) the creep of darkness was so slow and gradual, the imperceptible accumulation of days, weeks, months before I began to notice that light faded at 6 at night, as opposed to 8:30. This slow, steady, hardly perceptible accumulation of change is a reminder to temper my expectations for change in the physical manifestation of healing in my own body. While I, or we, may wish and sometimes try to will healing to happen faster, more often it’s not until I look back and see that things have indeed changed! Immaterial and without density, our minds and Spirit, can change instantly (and often do), literally at the speed of light, whether that’s a lightbulb moment of inspiration, illumination, realization, or even just a change of heart or mood.

I believe that we ought to all believe in miracles - change for the better can happen instantaneously, but we will be long disappointed when we expect deep healing to occur at the speed of light, or at the speed of our thoughts and perceiving minds. There’s comfort in the slow accumulation of change in the material world, it allows us to be able to predict, rely, and steady ourselves on its more or less moment to moment constancy. As humans, we are physically made of the same clay of constancy as the Earth, rendering a good reminder that durable changes, sustained healing, and deep nourishment happen at the slow plod of earth turning with the seasons, and not without bouts of getting stuck in the mud of rutted patterns. So often it’s the disjunction of moving at the speed of light (or minds) in these earthen bodies that can cause health disharmonies. For myself, I first notice that I’ve been a disembodied head moving through the world through my belly - a loss in appetite, a feeling of nausea, a lack of ability to fully experience and appreciate my food… How do you know when you’ve been moving too fast for too long?

“Dreaming after all is a form of planning.” -Gloria Steinem

It’s the depth of Winter. While the light continues to grow longer and stronger each day, the earth where I live is mostly frozen and set for a couple more months. The lack of light and warmth In Winter causes our energies to withdraw and contract to more fully support our core energies needed for survival - we can live without a finger, but we can’t live without a heart. Our moods reflect that similar inward trajectory that often feels like Seasonal Affective Disorder or depression. Just as the trees have stripped down to their skeletal essentials, in Winter we learn how to encounter the bare essentials of who we are. Winter invites us to go inwards where the light shines strongest: retreat, reflect (bring the light of your attention inwards), slow down to the pace of your core energies, and even surrender to the darkness within and outside of us. What lies there in the darkness awaiting your excavation and discovery about yourself? Light or our awareness, not heat (the desire or effort to create change), can transform darkness.

Preceding Spring’s exuberant growth is Winter’s dormancy. While at the surface of the earth - our conscious minds - nothing is happening during Winter; beneath the surface - our unconscious minds - we and the tree are resting deeply, consolidating energy, integrating the past year’s growth, shifting and creating forms and shapes and structures, accommodating for new growth, creating meaning and coherence from experiences and emotions, and laying the foundations that will shape growth and provide the resources to fuel the next stage or season of growth. Just as we need sleep to survive, the earth needs time to be fallow to be fertile; the trees need a season of dormancy; and we as humans also require a season to consolidate, integrate and dream to keep growing and evolving. These essential functions are entirely unconscious and cannot be prodded along with efforting; they require space, time, self-compassion and self-care to simply be, and our willingness to surrender to the process.

Rather than distracting ourselves from uncomfortable emotions or empty time by reaching for a long to-do list, your device, Netflix, a snack, or even for the voice of a familiar friend, what happens if we can be with and hold that wild edge of boredom, of the unknown, of uncomfortable emotions without trying to fix anything? What emerges from those empty moments? This is the wild edge of living - the place where we can make more space and surrender a little bit more into the darkness, into the unknown, into discomfort, and ultimately begin to behold what lies beyond the realm of our conscious knowing. What is awaiting to be manifested within you? When we surrender, we let our guard down and allow forces beyond our control to shape us, heal us, and begin to refine us into truer versions of ourselves.

What lies within that potentiated space of You?

More Ways to Surrender more deeply: Let your exhales be bigger and more complete (allow them to touch your root); take time to surrender rather than push when you feel stuck trying to figure something out; make plenty of space to dream (at night and during the day); “sleep on it” when considering complicated problems; meditate; engage your parasympathetic nervous system with warmth - warm baths, fireside lounges, keeping your feet toasty, warm beverages; surrender to boredom; simply be :) More ideas?

'Nourishment' is an interesting concept: it is the physical sense of taking in a satisfying experience and allowing it to become a part of you, whether that's at the level of food that feeds your body, ideas that feed your mind, or even experiences that feed our soul. Appreciation and enjoyment of what we ingest differentiate nourishment from just nutrition, ideas from facts, and a moment from an experience. Appreciation and enjoyment transform and alchemize simple nutrients into deep nourishment. While nutrients may fuel you, nourishment feeds your whole body and spirit; luckily they aren't mutually exclusive! Does your body experience physical nourishment every day when you eat? Our senses are the gateway into appreciation.

What does the experience of physical nourishment feel like? I experience physical nourishment as a whole being satisfaction, satiation, and wholeness that resonates much deeper than the tickle of tastebuds. For me, when I finish a meal and feel well nourished - warmth, openness, and even happiness spread and brighten into my eyes, head, limbs, and whole body… leaving me feeling at peace and squarely in the present moment. Another bite of anything more wouldn't add to my satisfaction, but may actually detract from it!

As Americans, I find that we think in very scientific and reductive culinary terms, such that we create meals that may be over-flowng with nutrition, but do not necessarily engage and prime the senses - they often don’t look enticing, smell delicious, or taste good, but we think that the important thing is that they are “good for us”. This happens when we make meal decisions based soley on what we think we should eat, which inevitably doesn’t take into full account what our bodies may crave, need, or want, as well as on the other extreme: meals loaded with appeal, but lacking in substantive nutritional value. Both extremes contribute to Americans having the highest rate of obesity among developed nations. One characteristic of obesity is leptin resistance. Leptin resistance is an inability to feel full, satisfied, and nourished. Fall is my favorite time to slow down and begin moving at the pace of body time, food-making and deeper food-appreciation again, where pondering food, enjoying food and food preparation take on larger portions of time, so that I begin to re-engage those deeper sensations of satisfaction, appreciation, and nourishment.

SOME TIPS TO TRANSFORM NUTRITION INTRO NOURISHMENT:

-Cook it! Cooking food breaks down the components so that together they can become something newly delicious that’s easier for our bellies to digest, and begins enticing us with delicious aromas that begin the digestive process.

-Be intentional: I find that thoughtfully and intentionally created meals require less food to feel equally satisfied. Using recipes can be helpful here, especially if you’re new to cooking!

-Take time to enjoy the meal; don’t eat on the go!

-Have a dinner buddy! Make your meal into an enjoyable experience, by finding other ways to appreciate it, like enjoying it with good company : ).

-Eat 2-3 square meals, rather than graze: Aim for real satisfaction and satiation with each meal, so that you don’t just wish you were parked in front of the food pantry all day wondering what will give you a brief hit of satiation.

-Include enough fat in your meals: fat is necessary for our bodies, as well as inviting deeper and longer satiation.

-Aim to engage all of your senses with your meal and be present: a beautiful or colorful presentation, delicious and enticing aromas, flavorful with different flavors (like salty, sweet, sour, bitter) invites all of the tastebuds to open, and create an inviting environment…

Mmmmmm…. N’joy!

It’s Springtime in Appalachia and I’m reminded of how windy this mountain town can be! Winds howl outside, rustling trees and even my large apartment structure. They are howling winds, biting winds, cleansing winds - winds herald change! How easefully can you adapt to change?

The opportunity of this quarantine or the Medicine of the Moment for me is: how can we deepen our connection with ourselves to source our own medicine? The health of your stems depend upon the strength of your roots.

In other words, how do we strengthen our root?  By making a relationship with ourselves - any activity, practice, experience that brings you closer to feeling embodied, empowered, interconnected and at peace within - strengthens your root, and brings you home!  For some that may be a movement practice, or expression through collaging or journaling, or walking quietly in nature, or being present with others in sacred ceremony, or beautifying your home, or meditation, or reading your favorite book with your cat!  With this opportunity of extra time, let's recover, discover, and deepen these oftentimes 'missed connections' with ourselves.  In times of upheaval and change, it's the strength of our roots (and the ability to be flexible) that allows us not to be "blown over".